Thursday, September 9, 2010

Where To Start?

My dear friends and family, I am truly blessed to have you in my life. And I pray that your eyes are enlightened to see the blessing the Lord is bringing your way through this partnership we are in. Writing to you as been trying lately, due the internet has been down here for some time. I am thankful for technology we have to be able to share in this endeavor together. But only share with you so much, because there is so much I don't understand yet, things I am learning, and things God is doing in me through this experience. But it excites me to think that one day we will sit down and talk about this, and can really share with what we have done here in Brasil.

I will ask this of you, that you will increase the prayer going forth. You see, I knew I would have to count the cost before I set out on this call of the Lord. But I will be totally honest with you. I never knew what that really meant. I just had a yes in my spirit to whatever the Lord wanted to do. I received some tragic news from home. A dear and close friend of my took his own life. When I say close, I was sharing with him the Lord Jesus for some time before I came here. He came to me and wanted to change his life. I knew some things have been going on, but I did not know the severity of the situation. I helped him get plugged into to a church and then it was time for me to leave for Brasil.

I went through some of the best and worst of life with him. He was close to my family and my community of Morton. It is very difficult to be here right now and not be with everyone back home who is mourning this tragic loss. I will say to you that it is worth it to be here, but that is purely out of obedience to the word of God. My heart is severely crushed and broken right now.
And I pray for time of healing to go swiftly, but it is going to take time. I am blessed to have great friends and church family here to support me through this time. It is very hard to not go home right now, I know the Lord has me here for a purpose. Excepting this news is hard, But I have given up my right to understand. 1 Timothy 3:16 says " Without controversy, Great is the mystery of Godliness. " I can't explain Him or His ways, all I can do is fall down before Him and worship Him, because I know He is worthy.

I know he makes all things work together for the good of those who love Him - Romans 8:28. And know that walking in faith means you have to except the mystery. His thoughts and ways are so much higher than ours. The way He thinks is not the way we think. I don't understand how He will make this work together for the good of those who love him, but I know He can. As I sit here and write this, am looking at a hat my sister Amanda just made for me and it says -God Is Good All the Time, and He is, I believe that but some day we will know it in the very depths of our hearts, that it wont be something we just say we believe, but we will know it. But for right now it is a mystery, a belief, it is FAITH.

His grace is sufficient, and and his power is made perfect in our weakness. So I will carry on boasting the the goodness of the Lord so that his power may rest in me through my weakness -2 Corinthians 12-. So I will carry on only be grace. I am have some great and exciting things to share with about what has been happening here. But not at this point. I just want to mourn the loss my my dear friend and brother Brandon Buffington. So I am going to cry, and be sad, but I will be watching to see this tears turned to Joy, and see the power of Jesus through my weak heart. Friends I love you and miss you. And will write to you again shortly, I just need some time. Please Be praying for Brandon's family, my family, and all my friends back home that are struck with this tragic loss. Thank you and God Bless! HE IS FAITHFUL TO THE AND FAITHFUL TO OUR HEARTS!

3 comments:

  1. I understand the pain you are feeling right now only too well. God will see you all through this. I will absolutely increase my prayer, and include all those who Brandon touched while he shared this space with us.
    Love you and your heart for God, Tim. You are such an inspiration to so many. Having a "yes God" heart isn't as prevalent as many think it is. You are such an obedient and loving son of the King....and as His son, He has plenty of room on His lap for you. Crawl up there and get some Daddy time, and know that He will hold you through this!

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  2. Tim, I love you and I love what you are doing! Thank God for brothers like you. I pray that God wraps his loving arms around you and gives you the comfort you need in this difficult time. I will continue to pray for you and I will also pray for Brandon's family and your family as well.

    Love you brother,
    Benny

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  3. Praying for you, Timmy. :(
    One thing you can know is that you did share the Truth with this close friend of yours.. so at least you are not regretting that. There are definitely some things in life that just DO NOT make sense to us - but God is Sovereign and works in all things. May He show you more revelation through this somehow and increase in you in an even greater level!
    <3 Joan

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